How do you deal with perfectionism as an entrepreneur?

I’ve always worn perfectionism as a badge of honour. If my work is perfect, then everyone is going to want to work with me. I’ll get clients easily, hang out with the popular coaching crowd, and make a ton of money in my sleep…

The truth was different. Perfectionism almost killed my business before I even started it…

At the very start, I hid behind a beautiful website, an impeccable social media presence, and the image of a successful coach who never made mistakes…

People told me they loved my work and surely, I must have been making 6+ figures… Truth is, I was broke. All those people who said they loved my work? No one wanted to work with me.

Here’s why…

I was too perfect. As a coach, people need to be able to identify with you, to know you’ve once been where they are now, so they can believe you can help them go to that next level. By never sharing challenges or imperfections, they couldn’t resonate with me.

Another way perfectionism was hurting my business: I was hiding behind social media and blogging because I was afraid of doing public speaking or selling.

I wasn’t good at them and perfectionism demands excellence on the first try… even when you’re doing something you’ve never done before – thus guaranteeing I’d never do it and never get the results I wanted! Crazy, right?

Perfectionism is the frenemy that promises to help you reach your goals while sabotaging you behind your back. So why do we think perfectionism is good?

What Perfectionism Is NOT

If you’re a high-achiever like me, you may think perfectionism is a good thing. Doesn’t it help you strive for excellence and succeed? Not really. Let me debunk the common myths that make perfectionism sexy:

1. Perfectionism is not a personality trait: This isn’t something that you are, like introvert or extrovert. You don’t become less when you ditch perfectionism. You just become more of who you really are.
2. Perfectionism isn’t the key to success: This isn’t a superpower that can help you achieve your goals. It’s kryptonite that holds you back from the work you’re meant to do in the world.
3. Perfectionism isn’t excellence: Excellence is about being the best person YOU can be and doing the best work YOU can do. Perfectionism is about conforming to unattainable standards decided by… whom?

Related: The Real Secret To Success (No One Ever Tells You About)

What Perfectionism Really Is

Perfectionism is fear in a fancy dress.

You’re scared of how people will perceive the real you. What will they think of you? Will they like you? Will they accept you?

Instead of risking rejection, you put your fancy dress on. Surely people will love that? Putting that dress on makes you feel in control. If you look perfect, are perfect, and have the perfect business and life, then no one can criticise you, reject you, or hurt you.

But… if doesn’t work. You – or the fake you you’re showing the world – still gets criticised, rejected, hurt. Because, no matter how much you try, you can only control your actions, NOT other people’s perceptions of you.

Related: How To Overcome The Fear Of Rejection Once And For All

5 Ways Perfectionism Is Keeping You From Reaching Your Business Goals

Here are all the ways perfectionism is keeping you small and stopping you from reaching your big business goals:

1. Perfectionism Keeps You Stuck

As an entrepreneur, you have many goals you want to achieve. Make 6+ figures, be interviewed by Oprah, sell out coaching programmes and retreats, become a household name in your industry and hang out with people you admire.

But perfectionism pulls the brake. What if you make a mistake and people laugh at you? What if you fail? What if people can tell you’re just starting out and you’re not that good yet? If you can’t do something perfectly, perfectionism whispers in your ear, better not even try.

The problem with this? Making mistakes is part of the learning process. You won’t become a master at anything if you’re not willing to suck at it at first.

• You won’t master sales if you’re not willing to make a hundred offers and be rejected a hundred times.
• You won’t master public speaking if you’re not willing to bomb your first few speeches.
• You won’t master networking if you’re not willing to have a few awkward interactions.

Perfectionism doesn’t allows this. Instead, it tells you to keep doing what you’ve always done, the same thing you’re really good at – even if it bores you and, in the current times, may not even work anymore. At least you’re good at it, right?

In the online space, things evolve fast. The tactics that used to bring in 6-figures launches two years ago don’t work anymore today. If you’re not willing to constantly master new things – and suck at them at first -, you’ll be successful only for a season. What are you going to do when your tactics don’t work anymore?

2. Perfectionism Hurts Your Self-Esteem

Perfection is unattainable. I know it. You know it. We all know it.

But you still strive for it. Deep down, there’s a part of you who believes that looking like Gigi Hadid, creating high-quality videos like Marie Forleo, or have an apartment as clean as Monica Geller’s is possible – aren’t they doing it, after all?

Problem is… you never quite reach those standards. And so, you beat yourself up for it and feel like a failure – while completely ignoring all the good qualities you have and things you have accomplished.

Here’s how this hurts your business. When you don’t feel good enough:

• You lower your prices, so you always struggle to make ends meet
• You have no boundaries with clients, and end up working more for less money
• You take on nightmare clients who create all kinds of problems for you
• You follow other people’s advice on how to grow your business, and you end up building something that doesn’t feel aligned at all – and doesn’t even bring you as much money as they promised you
• You invest a small fortune in courses and programmes, but never implement what they teach so you never get results

Waiting until you feel good enough to increase your prices or set boundaries doesn’t work. Marie Forleo didn’t make high-quality videos from the start. Heck, her first video was so poorly shot, she only showed half her face! But she kept at it and, over the years, improved her craft to the level it is today.

You’re never going to reach excellence if you’re not willing to start messy.

Related: How To Build The Confidence To Start And Grow Your Business

3. Perfectionist Hinders Decision Making

“Successful people make decisions quickly and firmly. Unsuccessful people make decisions slowly, and they change them often.” – Napoleon Hill

Perfectionism puts you squarely in the unsuccessful camp. It makes you believe you can’t move forward until you make the perfect decision, keeping you stuck in analysis paralysis forever.

Successful people know there’s no perfect decision. They make a decision and move forward. If it doesn’t work, they make another quick decision and pivot. 

Adjusting as you go ahead, not waiting for perfection, is how you get results.

4. Perfectionism Increases Stress (And Risk Of Anxiety, Depression, Etc)

Perfectionism requires that everything you say, every action you take, every project you start be absolutely, 100% perfect. Pressure much? That pressure puts a huge amount of stress on you – every single minute of every single day. 

Chronic stress is the root of all evil. It puts your body in constant fight or flight mode, turning even the most normal of situations into a potential threat – because to the perfectionist’s mind, not attaining perfection will result in rejection and abandonment.

When you’re in constant fight or flight mode, your immune system takes a hit. You’re more prone to anxiety, depression, cancer, cardiovascular diseases… You can’t build a successful business from that place (trust me, I’ve tried).

5. Perfectionism Isn’t Authentic

The biggest way perfectionism holds you back in your business is by hiding the real you.

When you’re showing up as Little Miss Perfect, people can feel it. They can feel you’re not authentic, that you’re trying to be someone you’re not.

This is what happened to me. I created such a perfect image that people thought I was somehow special and so they couldn’t get the same results as me – when in reality, I was just as imperfect and messy!

Give yourself permission to take off the fancy dress and show people who you are. Show them what you had to overcome to get to where you are now. Take them on a journey with you.

I know it’s scary. It’s also how human beings connect. You’ll be surprised by what happens when you allow people to see the real you.

Vulnerability will get you all the things perfectionism always promised you but never delivered. 

Related: Who Do You Need To Become To Build Your Dream Business?

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How To Overcome Perfectionism

Here’s a 4-step process to overcome perfectionism once and for all.

Step 1. Identify The Root Of Perfectionism

At the root cause of perfectionism is the fear of not being good enough.

Somewhere in your past, someone made you feel unworthy or not good enough. Maybe you:

• Grew up with overly critical parents you were never able to please, no matter what you did
• Were shamed by a teacher in front of the whole class for failing a test
• Were praised only when your results were excellent – anything less than that was seen as a failure
• Growing up reading women’s magazines that only portrayed one standard of beauty – and now believe you need to conform to it in order to be loved.

This is called an Origin Story, the moment when you first felt that you weren’t good enough. And so, to protect you from that pain, your brain made up a story that, if you were perfect, you’d never be hurt again.

Related: How To Reprogram Your Subconscious Mind For Success

Step 2. Connect With The Cost Of Perfectionism

Now you’ve identified the limiting belief at the root of your perfectionism, answer yourself, what’s the price you’re paying for it?

I believed that perfectionism would help me grow my business. In reality, it was sabotaging it and keeping me from reaching my goals. People couldn’t identify with me, and so didn’t think I was the right coach to help them get the results they wanted. Perfectionism also kept me stuck using old strategies that weren’t working anymore.

Here’s the prices that I was paying for it:

• Financially: I wasn’t making the money I wanted to make. I was living in a crappy flat share, rarely going on holidays, buying the cheapest of everything… Financial freedom was far away.
• Physically: I was always working overtime trying to do everything perfectly. I barely got any sleep and I was constantly overwhelmed. Keeping up appearances is exhausting…
• Emotionally: I always felt I wasn’t good enough. Not getting clients made me feel like a failure. I also felt like I was wasting my life away. Without clients, I wasn’t fulfilling my purpose and helping anyone.
• Relationships: I didn’t have much time to spend with my friends and boyfriend, so we started growing apart. When I spent time with them, I was often tired and cranky, which put a toll on the relationship.

These are just some of the prices that I was paying – without even realising it! This is a wake up call. Once you realise what perfectionism is really costing you, you have a choice: you can keep trying to be perfect or you can ditch perfectionism and create a different story.

Which story are you going to choose?

Related: What To Do When You Feel Discouraged

Step 3: Take Imperfect Action To Overcome Perfectionism

Now that you know what perfectionism is costing you, it’s time to take imperfect action. What’s the first step you need to take to reach your goal? The one you know you should be taking, but have been hesitant to because you don’t feel good enough for it?

Maybe it’s writing a sales email for your coaching programme. Or going live for the first time in your Facebook group. Or sending a pitch to 10 podcasts.

Whatever it is, do it now. Start small. For example, if you want to go live, but are afraid to, start going live privately on IG. You’ll get some practice without anyone seeing your live. When you’re ready, go live to the public.

The goal here isn’t to do everything perfectly. The goal is to get going. Confidence comes from competence. You need to get better and better at something before you can feel confident to do it. So give yourself whatever you need to start practicing in a safe space and, when your skills improve, go out into the world.

In the process, be kind to yourself. Everyone sucks when they do something for the first time. Mastery comes from repetition, doing the same thing over and over and over again. One little imperfect action at a time, do it there.

Related: How To Start When You Don’t Feel Ready

Step 4: Get Help To Overcome Perfectionism

The steps to overcoming perfectionism are simple, but not easy. The truth is, you can analyse your origin story and limiting beliefs from every angle for years, but you’re not going to overcome perfectionism until you start taking imperfect action and realise that’s gonna bring you everything you ever wanted.

Mindset work is the easy part. But once it’s time to take that imperfect action, your feelings will sabotage you. You’ll feel so uncomfortable at being a beginner, afraid of making a mistake, nervous about what people will say if you mess up that you’ll likely revert back to your own perfectionist ways.

The missing piece is accountability. When you join The Leadership Advantage and get access to the Self-Sabotage Solution System, you’ll have me hold you accountable every week through personal check-ins and coaching calls. This is why my clients get results in 2 to 3 months.

Doing it alone is self-sabotage. Your brain knows that, without accountability, you’ll never make serious progress and you’ll always stay stuck in perfectionism. If you’re serious, you’ll quieten that lone wolfing voice and get the support you need – from me or someone else.

Wrapping It Up

Perfectionism isn’t who you are. It’s not a superpower that helps you succeed. It’s just fear in a fancy dress: it promises to help you reach your dreams while stabbing you in the back. The best way to overcome perfectionism is to do the mindset work, take imperfect action, and have accountability so you’ll have no excuse to hold back anymore.

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