Have you ever been so afraid of failing at something that you decided not to try it at all?
🔵 “I need to do more research before I create my online course.”
🔵 “I tried to move into a different niche once and it didn’t work out. It’s just not meant to be.”
🔵 “It’s not realistic to have that big influencer on my podcast, so why even bother?”
That’s what you tell yourself to rationalise why you’re not going for your big business dreams. But deep down, you know it: they’re just excuses.
What’s really stopping you from taking action is the fear of failure.
Why Do You Experience The Fear Of Failure?
Building a successful business is scary. You might create a product no one wants. Do a webinar that bombs. Get rejected by publishers. Lose money. Make promises you can’t deliver. There are so many ways this could go wrong….
Your brain hates uncertainty. When you think of doing something new, your brain looks for past evidence you’ll succeed. If it can’t find it (how can it when you’ve never done it before?), it’ll consider it as a threat to avoid at all costs.
This is an evolutionary mechanism designed to keep you safe from venturing into forests alone where you could be killed by saber-toothed tigers or getting exiled from your community back when that meant certain death.
Most of the “threats” in our modern society aren’t threats at all. Failing may cause discomfort, disappointment and pain – nothing more.
But your brain doesn’t know it. And so, it tells you it’s safer to stay where you are, always thinking about doubling your revenue, experiencing financial freedom, and being the new influencer in your niche… and never taking action on it.
How Do You Experience Fear Of Failure?
Fear of failure shows up in lots of different ways, including:
👉 Low self-esteem
👉 Procrastination
👉 Reluctance to try new things
👉 Self-deprecation (like not accepting compliments)
👉 Self-sabotage (like not following through on your plans)
👉 Talking yourself out of opportunities you don’t feel qualified for
If you’re experiencing any of these, you’re not alone. Fear of failure is universal. We all have it – and we all can overcome it. Here’s how:
Related: 7 Ways You’re Sabotaging Your Success
How To Overcome The Fear Of Failure
1. Detach Your Results From Your Self-Worth
When I first started my business, I set a goal to sign up 4 clients a month. Month after month went by and I barely signed up a client here and there…
With every passing month, my confidence took a hit. A few months later, I felt so bad about my failure, I decided to scrap the goal at all… and almost quit my business. Surely, all these failures were proof I didn’t have what it takes to build a successful coaching business.
When you “fail” at something, your brain uses it as proof to confirm a story you have about yourself. Mine was “I’m not good enough” (I had massive imposter syndrome back then). You can keep believing that story or give up…
…Or you can learn to see results for what they really are: information on what’s not working. Your results are your feedback, NOT your self-worth.
How do you detach your self-worth from your results? The first step is to identify which story you’re telling yourself. What are you making your failure mean?
And then ignore it. Look, you can journal on it, do affirmations, create a different story. All these tools work, but they’re just cratches.
What really works is identifying the lies your brain is telling you and ignore them. Tell your brain you refuse to think those thoughts and take action to prove the story wrong.
TAKE ACTION NOW
What are you making failure mean? What’s the story you’re telling yourself about it? Get clear on it, so that, when your brain brings up those thoughts, you can consciously choose not to believe them. And then, take action anyway.
2. Evaluate Your Results Objectively.
Your results are your feedback. They’re neutral information that helps you understand what’s not working, so you can tweak it and get better results next time.
Struggling entrepreneurs ask: “What’s wrong with me? What did I do wrong?”
When you ask these questions, you’re attaching your results to your self-worth. If you’re the problem, if you believe that story your brain is telling you, there’s nothing you can do about it.
Successful entrepreneurs ask: “What didn’t work?”
They don’t take their lack of results personally. They look at the strategy they used and their way of being while implementing it to find out what didn’t work, so they can course correct.
Take my client, W. When she came to me, she was booking discovery calls consistently, but didn’t close any of them! When we look at what didn’t work, we discovered two things:
- Strategy: She didn’t have a script or strategy for sales calls. She’s simply ask people what helped they needed and answered their questions on the spot, so they’d never have to hire her! She didn’t know what to say to transition from diagnosing the problem to offering her own paid solutions.
- Way of being: She was confident helping people and answering their questions, but as soon as she had to sell her services, she’d be hesitant and insecure. Even if she had had the right script, she wouldn’t have had the confidence to execute it in a way that made people confident to work with her.
First, we worked on getting W. confident and excited to offer services to the people who needed them and then we tweaked the strategy and script so that people would be eager to say yes.
Within 3 months, she had to a FULL coaching practice. This is what happens when you don’t get attached to your results and use them to constantly tweak and redefine your approach, so you can hit your goal.
TAKE ACTION NOW
Think of a goal you’ve been working on. Then, every week (I like to do this on a Sunday or Monday), evaluate your results:
- What in the strategy didn’t work?
- What in my way of being didn’t work?
- Then brainstorm solution, so you can tweak your approach and get a different result next time.
Related: It’s Not Failure. It’s Feedback.
3. Don’t Give Up
Everyone’s talking about reaching 6-figures in 6 months, but the truth is, the people who reach that goals are unicorns who have already spent years overcoming all their subconscious blocks to success, including the fear of failure.
If you’re not there yet, that’s ok. Just keep evaluating your results, tweaking your strategy, and silencing your brain when it tells you things aren’t working. They ARE working.
Every successful entrepreneur I know has had to tweak their strategy and increase their confidence to reach their goals. They’re successful because they’re failed more times than you – and used that feedback to constantly improve.
So don’t give up now. If you’re not where you want to be and you’re not sure how to tweak your strategy or who you need to be to implement it, ask for help. Join The Leadership Advantage, so you can get access to my proven system to break through your subconscious blocks to success, like the fear of failure, and reach your big business and income goals in 90 days – just like W. did.
You’re not failing because you need to tweak the strategy and it’s taking longer than you’d like. If you keep tweaking and redefining, you’ll get there. The only failure is to quit. That’s the only way you’ll never reach your goals.
Wrapping It Up
Fear of failure is natural – but it doesn’t have to stop you. Detach your results from your self-worth and use them as feedback to tweak what’s not working, so you can course correct and reach your goals faster.
Are you an overwhelmed female entrepreneur, coach, or service-based provider ready to break through your current plateau and reach your next income level?
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