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3 Ways To Build Trust In Yourself

Mindset

December 7, 2020

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Hi there! I'm Giorgia, a life purpose and business coach. I help you find your calling and turn it into a business, so you can make the impact you were born to make.

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how to build trust in yourself 02

Have you ever had a gut feeling that you were meant to do something… and totally ignored it?

Because it sounded crazy.

Because it wasn’t realistic.

Because you had no idea how you could pull it off.

That’s how I felt when I first got the call to move to London. It didn’t make any sense. What would a small town girl from Italy like me do in a big city like that?

I didn’t know anyone there.

I didn’t have a job waiting for me (or any idea of what to do once there).

I didn’t have a big pile of cash to support me while I found my way.

All my friends, family, and boyfriend were back home. And they were warning me about what happens to little girls who venture out into the big city alone (it’s not pretty).

I had more reasons to stay than to go. And so I stayed… for years. Because I didn’t trust myself to listen to my intuition and do what I knew in my heart was right – when everyone else thought it was wrong.

But, that voice that I was meant to be in London, that I would finally find what I was looking for there, never went away. If anything, it only grew stronger until I couldn’t ignore it anymore.

It took me a few years. But, I’ve finally taken that leap and moved to London. Now I have the job of my dreams – and nothing of the bad things my friends and family had predicted has come true.

When you follow your intuition, things always work out for the best. So why is it so hard to trust yourself and believe you’re making the right choice?

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Why You Don’t Trust Yourself

Have you ever had a gut feeling that something was wrong, totally ignored it (because it didn’t make sense), and beaten yourself up about it when it turned out to be true?

When you ignore your intuition, you end up making mistakes. Like taking on a writing project you knew didn’t align with your values. Or staying too long in a relationship with the wrong guy. Or ordering a takeaway dinner you know you’ll regret the next day.

Every time this happens, you lose a bit of trust in yourself. You start thinking you can’t make the right decision, that you won’t follow through with it, that something will happen and you will screw things up…

And so, you start to look for answers outside of yourself. You ask for advice to your friends and family – even if they’ve never done what you want to do (literally none of the people who told me moving to London was a bad idea had ever left our hometown…) -, scour Google for answers to your doubts, maybe you even consult your horoscope to know if the stars are aligned and it’s the best time for you to move ahead.

That’s when you really screw up. 

Here’s the truth, gorgeous: the answers you’re looking for are already within yourself.

You are your own guru. No one – not your family, not your friends, not your colleagues, not the media, not even your coach – know what’s right for you better than you do.

All you need to do is tune in, listen to your intuition, and trust it’s leading you in the right direction.

Easier said than done, I know. Here are 3 easy ways you can build trust in yourself and follow the guidance of your intuition:

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1. Practice Mindfulness

Can you even hear your intuition?! In this crazy world, its soft voice is drowned by social media notifications, an onslaught of ads and scary world news, the voices of your friends and family… Everyone has an opinion they want to share, a product they want to sell you, something urgent you need to pay attention to.

Argh!

Your intuition doesn’t like chaos. You can hear its soft voice better when you’re alone, totally focused on the present moment.

It’s a skill that takes practice. All you need to do is spend some time with yourself. Jot down your thoughts in a journal. Meditate for a few minutes a day. Go for a walk in nature (leave the headphones at home!). Take a bubble bath and let your thoughts melt away.

It’s in the stillness that you find clarity.

Related: How To Deal With Uncertainty About The Future

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2. Keep Promises To Yourself

Do you trust people who constantly break their promises to you? Guess not.

So how can you trust yourself when you’re constantly breaking promises to yourself?

Like, all the times you said you would never do some extra free work for your boss. Or clean up after your boyfriend when you’d rather put your feet up and relax. Or turn off your phone an hour before bed only to be still scrolling through Instagram at 1:30 am.

Or all the goals you never achieved. You swore this time you’d go for a two miles-long run every day and finally lose the extra weight, but two days in, your body is in pain and you’ve given up. Again.

Or that time you’ve decided to start freelancing on the side and make $3K in your first month. 30 days later, you’ve barely made $100 and you shut up business.

When you violate your word or set unrealistic goals, you lose trust in yourself and your abilities. Only make promises to yourself that you know you can keep. 

Going for a run every day when you’ve never exercised consistently before isn’t gonna work. Instead, go for a short walk 3 times a week and slowly increase duration and frequency. 

As for cleaning up after your boyfriend (or doing anything else for other people), make a choice. Either accept that you’ll always pick up after his mess and be ok with that. Or make the decision to stop picking up after him and accept that the house is gonna be messy for a while. 

Make a decision and follow through. 

Related: How To Make The Right Decision When Your Head And Your Heart Don’t Agree

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3. Listen To Your Feelings Without Rationalising Them

How can you listen to your intuition when what it tells you doesn’t make any sense?

When my intuition told me to leave my life in Italy to move to London without a job, friends, or even the slightest idea of what to do once there, I thought it was a perfectly stupid idea. Like, who does that?!

Same when I heard the call to be a life purpose. Like, is that even a job? Do people pay you for that?! And who am I to be a coach (I didn’t have any qualifications back then)?

Your intuition isn’t rational. Trying to make sense of it will only give you a headache (trust me on this).

Your intuition is a different type of intelligence. It follows what’s right, what lights you up, what brings you joy. 

Don’t doubt it. Just follow it and see where it leads you. 

Everything will work out for the best, I promise.

Related: How To Enjoy The Journey, Not Just The Destination


Struggling to figure out what your life purpose is (because, so far, nothing makes sense?) Download your FREE “Purpose Finder Workbook” to find out today:

 

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I'm Giorgia, a life purpose and business coach. I help you find your calling and turn it into a business, so you can make the impact you were born to make.

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purpose finder worksheet

Have no idea what you're born to do or what business to start? Find out today.

DOWNLOAD

FREE DOWNLOAD

purpose finder worksheet

Have no idea what to do with your life and what business to start? Download the Purpose Finder Worksheet to find out today.

free download