Do you ever feel like life’s passing you by?
You’d love to get that book deal, start your coaching business, or travel all over the world. But, somehow, you always get passed over. Someone else gets the opportunity instead.
I used to be so angry when that happened to me.
The world is so unfair, I thought. It’s all about who you know. Being the prettiest girl in the room. Getting friendly with the boss.
Connections, beauty, and charm can be shortcuts to success. But unless you have the talent to back them up, they aren’t gonna get you far.
What gets you far is going for it. Taking action every day to make your dreams come true.
Have you been doing that?
If you’re really honest with yourself, you’ll realise a lot of opportunities have passed you by because you were too scared to grab them with both hands.
When I started my first beauty blog twelve years ago, I barely promoted it. I thought if the content was good enough, people would come. No need to toot my horn.
The truth is, I was scared. I knew that if I wanted to take the blog to the next level and be given the amazing opportunities I saw others enjoy, I’d have to network with influencers, be more active on social media, and possibly even move to the bigger city where all the big events are.
But I couldn’t.
My Inner Mean Girl kept whispering in my head there was no point in even sending a friendly tweet to an influencer. “They’ll never notice you, Giorgia,” she said. “You’re not good enough/pretty enough/big enough/whatever enough to hang out with them. ”
For years, I listened to her. I kept writing my blog, made friends with other bloggers who were just starting out on their blogging journey, and played in my small pond, away from the big league.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m incredibly proud of everything I’ve achieved with that blog, grateful for the friends I’ve made along the way, and thankful for the opportunities it has given me.
But, it wasn’t until I took the decision to move to London that I was able to turn that blog into a business. Beautiful with Brains grew more in that first year in the big city than in the 7 previous years combined.
That’s what happens when you stop waiting for opportunities to knock at your door and start doing the knocking. Once I got out of my own way and started putting myself out there, everything changed.
I’d be lying if I said I am comfortable doing it. I’m not, and I’ve had my fair share of rejections – but the alternative is worse.
You can deal with the discomfort of chasing your dreams or with the regret of never seeing them come true. Which one will you choose?
These days I’m choosing the discomfort of chasing my dreams. Here are 3 easy ways I use to figure out which ones are worth chasing, take the leap, and avoid regrets:
How Much Do You Want It?
In the age of social media, it’s easy to think everyone is living a more exciting life than you.
“Look at that life coach! She started her business three months ago and she’s already bringing in six figures.”
“That blogger is travelling all over the world! Why is no one offering me a press trip for once?”
“That business owner just signed a book deal! I bet I could write a better book if I only I were given the chance.”
I’m sure you could. But do you really want to?
When you see someone achieve their goals and be given amazing opportunities, it’s only natural to want to be in their place.
But before you even try to achieve the same goals, ask yourself, “why do I want to do this? Do I want to be a successful life coach because it’s my true calling or because it seems like an easy shortcut to money, success, and travelling the world? Is this my dream or someone else’s?”
Sometimes, other people’s dreams seem so exciting, you can’t help make them your own. Until one day you realise it’s come true and it’s making you miserable. If it’s not really your dream, better abandon it now and pursue your true calling instead.
If it really is your dream, the thing you want more than anything, keep reading…
Not sure what your dream is or what you’re meant to do with your life? Download the Purpose Finder Workbook and find out your calling today:
What’s The Worst That Could Happen?
Nothing is scarier than the unknown. If you’ve never done something before, your Inner Mean Girl will come up with all sorts of reasons why it’s a bad idea.
When I had the idea to start my coaching business, The Treasures Within, my Inner Mean Girl did everything she could to sabotage me:
“Who do you think you are, Marie Forleo?! Quit now before you make a fool of yourself.”
“You’re not good enough to be a coach. No one will want to work with you.”
“You’ve never had a coaching business before. What makes you think you can do this? If you go ahead, you’ll be homeless in 3 months.”
And these are just some of the nicer things my Inner Mean Girl told me.
But, honestly, what’s the worst that could happen?
When I asked myself that question, I realised there really wasn’t any chance of me becoming homeless. Worst case scenario, my business would fail and I’d go back to my previous job.
In order words, I was already living my worst case scenario!
Would I be happy to end up back to square one? Of course, not. But, it wasn’t that scary. I knew I could handle it.
Besides, I wouldn’t really go back to square one, would I? I’d be older, wiser, and with a lot more experience.
When you ask yourself what’s the worst that can happen, you realise the worst isn’t really that scary. You can handle it.
Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone
If you really want something then you have to step out of your comfort zone and get it yourself. No one will ever hand it to you. Even the people who seem to be given every opportunity had to put themselves out there in order to get noticed.
Newsflash: No one can give you an opportunity if they don’t know you exist!
If you want to be featured on a podcast, send an email to the host introducing yourself and telling them why you’d make a great guest.
If you’re looking for clients, join a networking organisation and connect with people who can refer them to you.
If you’re dreaming of quitting your corporate job to start your business, start a side hustle to gauge demand and test your idea first.
There really is no way around this one. Whatever your dream is, you need to take action.
You only have one life so don’t let anything or anyone hold you back. Go for it.
Most of the time, the results will be positive. You’ll meet new people, learn new skills, experience new things, and have a lot of fun in the process.
You don’t want to miss out on all that, do you?
And if you fail, congratulations! You’ve just learned an important lesson. Now get up and try again – a different way this time.
The trick is to take it one step at a time. You’ll get there.